Getting By or Getting Better?

We all make mistakes. And sometimes others get hurt in the process.
When I accidentally step on someone's toe, I've caused discomfort to an other. Conceptually, that happens pretty often.
My response? I apologize. And then I move on with my life.
It's a very common phenomenon: We discomfit or embarrass someone, defuse the situation by expressing regret, and then continue unscathed down life's path.
Do we grow from the episode? Do I take the time to analyze why I was so careless as to step on someone's toe? Do I process and internalize so that I'm more sensitive to my surroundings next time? Too often, the answer is no. 
If I'm apologizing so as to navigate an awkward moment, or because I was caught doing something wrong, then the apology is externally generated and is unlikely to cause internal change.
It's only when I'm personally chagrined by my behavior, when I'm rattled internally, that growth can begin.
When the Jews were in Egypt, Moses kept begging Pharaoh to "let my people go". When he didn’t listen, G-d directed calamities to afflict Egypt, to help ‘convince’ Pharaoh to let the Jews leave. 

Yet, the Torah tells us that G-d "hardened Pharaoh's heart" so that he obstinately refused.

Why? If G-d was trying to force Pharaoh's capitulation, why get in the way by hardening his heart?
Actually, G-d had our point in mind.
G-d didn't obstruct genuine remorse on Pharaoh's part. He just didn't want a shallow, forced apology. G-d didn't want Pharaoh to recant his ways in order to stop the pain; that would be an easy - in fact, deceptive - way out.  G-d didn't allow for that, because G-d wants authentic self-reflection, genuine internal change.