Early one morning, I got a call from a congregant. “Mendy,” he asked in a halting tone, “How would I know if I’m dead?”
Blindsided by the question, I asked,“Where are you?”
“In Chicago. O’ Hare Airport.”
“When did you go to Chicago?”
“This morning. I just arrived.”
“Are you okay? What happened?”
“When I left home early this morning, it was pouring. As I drove down the highway, I could see a few cars around me. All of a sudden, I hit a patch of water and lost control. My car did two full 360 degree turns and finally stopped. I can’t believe I survived, and that none of the cars hit me.”
After speaking this through for a while, my friend calmed down. I then asked: “Do you remember what you were thinking as your car spun so frighteningly?”
“I was thinking of my wife and kids. Hoping they’d be okay without me.”
We met the next day, to recap my friend’s experience, and I suggested a daily exercise for him: Spend a few moments in the morning, reliving the trauma of that near-death experience, and soaking in the clarity it brought, his prioritization of family. I wanted this painful experience to be transformative for days and years ahead.
Human inspiration tends to be flash-in-the-pan. Just google ‘New Year’s resolutions’ to see how long they last.
When G-d was hammering Pharaoh and the Egyptians with painful plagues, Pharaoh would come to a breaking point and agree to free his Israelite slaves.
Then, the Torah relates, “when Pharaoh saw there was relief, he went back to being obstinate, paying no heed to Moses…”
Pain and trauma teach us lessons, but they only become enduringly transformative if we pro-actively keep them alive in our hearts and minds.
For most of 2023, Israel went through a particularly acute period of internal strife about judicial reform. The vicious pogroms of October 7, brought Israeli – and global Jewish – society together. Irrespective of where we stand on the observance spectrum, we’re recognizing that we need each other, and we need to unite for Israel.
This unity can last. October 7's pain be channeled into growth for Jews as a people.
It’s up to us.