Rabbi Mendy Herson's Blog

The Pursuit Of Happiness

Friday, May 28, 2021 - 10:46 AM

Notwithstanding the phraseology in our cherished Declaration of Independence, can we really “pursue happiness?”

A pursuit would seem to imply a tangible target, and a route to that target. What is happiness and how do you capture it?

Pleasure is not happiness. Pleasure is short term gratification. You can buy a steak, or a new car, and generate pleasure for yourself.

Happiness isn’t something you can pro-actively pursue. Happiness – I think you’ll agree - is a feeling that hits you when the conditions are right. In other words, we don’t have the control to grab it and pull it into our lives. We can just set ourselves up for it, and hope for that glorious waves of contentment – happiness – wash over our soul.

So, how do we set ourselves up for a happy life? By pursuing a life of purpose.

When we feel useful, when we feel that our efforts are successfully – albeit incrementally - contributing positively to something larger than ourselves, we’re primed for happiness. If I’m strengthening a relationship, bringing good to society, or building a business that helps my family and community, I’m ready to feel happy.

And difficult – or even stressful – work isn’t necessarily a contradiction to happiness. You can be internally happy even when you’re working hard, if you see the toil in a larger, meaningful context.

I need to feel that I matter, and that what I do matters. But it’s difficult to live a purposeful life in a purpose-less world, so we need to think about purpose in broader terms than just one’s individual pursuits.
Taking this to a theological place, that means recognizing G-d as a Loving Creator.
It’s the belief that you, your life (in all its details) and the world (in all its details) matter to our loving G-d that allows us to pursue a life of Meaning – as defined by our loving G-d.
No matter the day, we’ll probably have one obstacle or another.

And, no matter the day, we can – if we point our psyches toward higher purpose - still be happy.

Messages From Sinai

Friday, May 14, 2021 - 10:48 AM

Sunday evening, we begin the Holiday of Shavuot, which commemorates G-d’s giving, and our receiving, the Torah at Mount Sinai. Imagine several million recently-liberated slaves gathered at the mountain. They’ve experienced incredible miracles during their Exodus from Egypt, and for seven weeks they’ve been refining themselves – under Moses’s guidance – in order to receive the Gift of all Gifts: The Torah.

The Creator of the Universe will finally speak to humankind. What secrets will be revealed? Which mystical messages will resonate from there throughout the coming millennia?
Finally, the voice of the Divine: “Do Not Murder!” “Do Not Covet What Isn’t Yours!”
Can you imagine the people scratching their heads, saying “So THAT is it. What is the big deal?” It seems too simple.
Which is exactly the point.
The Torah is indeed an infinitely deep reservoir of wondrous messages. However, the Torah’s primary thrust is that life - the routine, day-to-day humdrum that we consider simple and mundane – can be cosmic, connected to the Infinite One. Holy.

How? By bringing G-d into our lives, even in the simple things. By accepting that G-d created us for a purpose, and that life is about accepting that perspective and living a life of responsibility.
So, if I refrain from hurting my neighbor because I believe it’s wrong, then I am serving MY value system. I’ve made a good choice, but not a [consciously] G-dly one.
When I recognize that, aside from my good instincts, G-d says it’s wrong to hurt someone, then I am submitting to a life of Divine direction. When I make a good decision with G-d as my guide, I am serving the Divine, and actualizing the reason for my existence.

So, G-d put seeming ‘no-brainers’ into the Torah to teach us that there’s no such thing. A ‘no-brainer’ means the action is reflexive and there’s no need for G-d consciousness. But there always is. Actions taken reflexively may happen to be good; but, when we take reflexive actions, our decision process is missing more than a brain, it is also missing an essential awareness of the role of our Divine creator in giving us purpose and the roadmap for fulfilling that purpose.

Join us on Monday morning to hear the Ten Commandments publicly, as they’ve been read – and internalized – for 3,333 years. And re-commit to a Holy life.

Life Is Meaningful Business

Thursday, May 6, 2021 - 10:52 AM

When I reflect on myself and my role in the world, the word 'merchant' doesn't come to mind. But it should, at least in the spiritual sense.

Chassidic thought teaches that life, our daily decisions and challenges, are all a form of 'Divine Commerce.’ Trade is the exchange of goods and commodities. When I buy something, it comes into my possession, and when I sell something I transfer ownership to someone else. That truth of basic business is also a framework for life.

We can each segment our lives into two basic domains: the meaningful and the less-than-meaningful. Each of our experiences in the course of a day automatically will seem to find a place in one category or the other. But we can actually move things from one domain to the other, engaging in ‘trade,’ as it were.

Let’s take a simple example: I’m busy, and a family member is calling my cell about something I consider less-than-important. The impending conversation may not be monumental, but our relationship is. So, I should see this 'mundane moment' as an opportunity for 'relationship-building'. I have an opportunity to transfer something in my life from the mundane category to the meaningful one.

I may still choose to defer the specific conversation until later. But I’ll be doing so from a healthy and respectful position. And If I genuinely consider the conversation as meaningful, the other person will too.

So, using 'commercial' language, we can actually procure slices of life from the trivial domain, and transfer them into the dominion of the meaningful.

This also applies to my relationship with the Divine.

If I eat a bowl of vegetable soup for lunch today, that’s relatively trivial. But does it need to be?

What if I first thank my Creator for this incredible life and the food I'm about to eat? What if I'm conscious of my need to make a difference in the world, and my need for nutrition as fuel? Is it still just a mundane bowl of soup?

If I'm mindful and focused, I can transfer my lunch from the mundane to the meaningful; the bowl of soup becomes a tool in my life’s mission. When I take a situation and infuse it with meaning, I'm ‘acquiring’ it for the Divine.

Spiritual commerce.

In the Torah, and in our Amidah liturgy, G-d is referred to as (if we translate the words literally) "the Purchaser of all things” (‘Koneh Hakol’). G-d gave us a world that seems disconnected from meaning, out of His 'domain'. Our job is to 'buy it back.’

And our acquired assets pay guaranteed dividends: The inner peace that comes with living a Purposeful Life.